You're up one day and the next you're down.
It's half an inch of water and you think you're gonna drown.
That's the way that the world goes 'round."
-John Prine
That's the Way the World Goes 'Round
We don't follow a linear path through life. That, I can tell you, is a fact as I've seen as many high peaks and low valleys as anyone.
It's not a challenge to have a cadre of "friends" at your side when you're riding high.
When you have a good job your opinions carry great weight, your jokes are funny and you don't have to look far for someone who is willing to carry the weight for you.
If you have money there will be people who are happy to help you spend it and nobody with drugs is in need of someone who will envibe with them.
You find the same dynamics in play in social media as you do in life.
Look at those who are most well know as users of any social media platform, including bloggers, and you'll find other people working on their behalf.
It doesn't take any longer than to snap your fingers to see that people look at your differently once your situation changes. People who were at your beck and call are suddenly challenged to find time for you and help is in short supply.
Any content high fliers in social media generate is considered worthy of promotion, regardless of quality. Attribute that same output to a "nobody" and I can guarantee you it will be left wanting for recognition.
It's the perception of who you are and what you are, as much if not more than the truth, that sets the tone.
As a person whose been treated for clinical depression, I'd say it's a safe bet that if you've been diagnosed with any mental illness you have experienced the feeling of "good friends" distancing themselves from you.
It's distasteful, I know, and if you haven't been on the downside in life these are concepts that are easy to dismiss.
I'm here to tell you, it's not a cliché to say that you learn who your real friends are when you're going through tough times.
These are the truths that have made Stand By Me a song that touched the souls of people. This is a song that speaks to the realities of life as much as any other.
I'm thankful, beyond words, for those who have chosen to stand by me through life's highs and lows.
2 comments:
To have a friend one needs to be a friend. But some never learn to repay friendship. We all, no doubt, have lost out when we found out some were merely fair weathered friends.
That is a lesson we can learn. It is also a way to protect yourself. Before the road becomes too difficult to traverse without support, test the waters of friendship. Pay attention to your relationships. If you are the one doing the majority of giving, especially the giving of emotional support, then chances are that person will not be or possibly cannot be there for you.
The will not be's are the dangers to your support network... they can weaken that chain, because they will not stay.
Do what you must to keep your chain strong.
Those times in life when true friends come to our aid are priceless, and teach us so much about what it means to be human - we're all in this together.
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